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Sunday, April 26, 2009

All about Jovann

Few days ago, I just finished reading a parenting book (it dwells on the question of how a child's emotional capacity grows in his first 3 yrs and the ideal kind of environment, home or childcare, it needs), which happened to mention that a young child's discipline is best shaped by a person he loves, since that person's opinion and approval holds some weight in that child's heart. If anyone who just has a casual or short term aquaintance with the child tries to discipline him, the effect of that is not lasting. As the child does not wholeheartedly seek that person's approval, the image of that person's dissapproving look in that child's mind influences his long term behaviour less than if that person is someone he loves. Disciplining by fear is less effective than disciplining by love. How true.

As with most parenting materials, almost every chapter of that book reveals something new that sends a light bulb going on in your brain. But I must admit when I read that chaper, that I harboured a slight cyniscm. Afterall, its not everytime that Jovann reacts positively to my admonishments, although I am positively(arrogantly) sure he loves me and hubby above everyone else. Hahaha...

So, that set me thinking, what can we do better? I spoke to hubby on the way home regarding some revealations and study recommendations highlighted in this book, and we decide to broadly realign certain parenting quirks/decisions from now on.

So its interesting to note that the next day at home in the evening, Jovann showed how true that discipline observation in that book is. We had just finished dinner, and he had just grabbed a piece of papaya in one hand, took a small bite and threw it back onto the plate.Then he ran off, with his sticky hands, and cleaned it on his clothes, on the cosy corner, and the cushions.

I was yelling at him to stop and let me clean his hands, but it went unheeded. So when the cushions got their share of papaya, I caught up with him and chided him for not listening to me. My voice was very angry but initially he seemed unfazed, still with the cheeky smile on his face. But after washing his hands, he suddenly said softly, with a trembling pout in his lips, "I don't want Mommy angry". Awww....at that moment I felt guilty, what the heck with papaya stains. So I hugged him and explained why I was mad and it has nothing to do how I love him.

Some recent quirks of Jovann.

+ Nowadays instead of saying "I love mommy, I don't love Daddy", now he says "I Love Mommy Daddy...". :)

+ He's back to his "bicycle ooh!". But now he asked us to hide underblanket, then when he "found" us, he will straddle us and pretended that he's riding a bike and bounced cheekily up and down, saying "bicycle oooh!, bicycle oooh!". I have no idea where he learnt that from!

+ He's been so sweet about protecting me. Yesterday hubby pretend to be a lion and wanna bite me, I yelled in pain and Jovann threw his little body over me and say "I protect you!" and shoo-ed Daddy away. Awwwwww......

Last Friday night, when lying in bed waiting for him to fall asleep, he turned towards me and held my right arm, saying "I wanna smell your t-shirt." He then took a big sniff and commented "so nice".

+ This boy has always hated blankets, kicking it away whenever any of us tried to cover im even a teeny weeny bit with it. But recently, he insisted on drinking his milk with the blanket all over him. together with the warm milk, this made him sweat buckets. Funny boy.

+ His word puzzle


+ There's something he has done for very very long time, but I have forgotten to record it. He has this little chant he likes to chant, the words may change, but the tone and rhythm don't vary.The original version goes "pi ka pi ka pika pika pi!". So funny! I don't know why he did it!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi

May I know where did you get those cute little puzzles for J?

Bin said...

Hi these are from Growing Fun. :)